700... walahadaraaaa!
May 25, 2003 - 2:49 p.m.

This entry, ladies and gentleman, is a party, and I am dedicating it to the readers, without whom this diary would be nothing. :::wipes tear from eye::: (Do I sound like a money-grubbing recording artist yet??)

First I will welcome the people who never sign my guestbook or talk to me and just kinda lurk in the background of my linkers. But have no fear, people, I love you just the same! :::hands some punch to Alicia::: I don't know if you even still hang around diaryland, but you were a toss up. You get some punch anyway. The next cup of punch goes to Jess. Next we have some punch for missramsey, vermicelli, caralynne, Danni, Becca, beneathroses, Blake, sysadmin, halleluyahel, ladyvivien, Andrewhobbs, and sparklefae. The punch isn't spiked, don't worry. I'm all anti-drinking, remember? Anypoo, it seems there are a lot of readers who don't contact me at all. It looks like I'm just trying to list peopole to make myself look good, but really it's kinda the opposite. No one wants to contact me! It's ok though, this entry is for you! I'm trying to make people feel special for being in an entry here!

Moving right along...

Now we have the people who contact me every once in awhile who I don't know much about. I'll let them play pin the tail on the donkey. Oh fun! Our first contestant is Spencersmom. She used to sign my guestbook all the time, but I think she's on a leave of absence. I hope life is treating you well! Spencersmom puts the tail on the donkey's head. Oops. Next we have Heather. She puts the tail on the donkey's neck. We're making some progress here. Now koji-chan steps up to the donkey and pins the tail on his back. Getting closer! For some reason, Ellen, giggleloop, and Ally all pin the tail on the back too. Weeeeird. Finally, Maritza steps up and pins the tail right on the donkey's ass! Hehe.. I said donkey's ass, that sounds redundant. Oh no! happybitter runs up and tears the tail off the donkey's bum and demands she win first place! Happybitter is kinda a wildcard cuz she doesn't have me listed as a favorite, but she links to me on her layout. I think she just doesn't like diaryland profiles. Anypoo, I inform happybitter that there are no prizes at my party because I'm cheap and this is fake anyway, so she returns the tail to its spot on the donkey.

Next is the pinata. This is for people who contact me a lot or are real life friends. Yay! Everyone takes turns bashing the pinata. Joe, Clau, Jenny the sexy bitch, JerryStanwood, Jeremy, and Jennifer all break it in a little bit, but it still has a ways to go. Next we have Charlie, Nathan, Erin, Jessica, Rachel, Louise, and Rachel. After all of them give it a swing, it's about ready to burst. Oh! Matt gets to take a swing too cuz I think he reads me every once in awhile even though he doesn't have me listed. And then.. from behind shadows ezi emerges and breaks that mofo into a million pieces, and candy falls all over the place. That bitch deleted her diary. I'm gonna hafta have a little talk with her!

Phew. That took way too long to type. You're all welcome to grab some of the candy. Also, if I didn't mention you and you have me linked, I sincerely apologize. I tried my best to include everyone, but I coulda missed someone. I also disregarded the last like ten names on my linkers list because they haven't updated in ages. Please don't be offended. I love you too. If I did happen to forget you, do not be shy to let me know. I will write a whole paragraph about you in my next entry. Of course, you have to have had me listed as a favorite. Otherwise you're just a cheater ;o)

Thank you all for coming to my 700th entry celebration, and please take a balloon on the way out. Ta! ~BOB

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