Shopping and Missing Charlie
January 8, 2003 - 12:24 a.m.

Speaking of birthdays, I kept forgetting to sing to JerryStanwood when his birthday was the 23rd, so I'm gonna do it now. Partially so he won't hate me anymore, but mostly because I do it every year. Really, look at all the entries after December 23rd in my diary. Anypoo, here goes:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU. HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR JERRYSTANWOOD. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

He's already 19. He's closer to 20 than I am. HA!

Today I actually did something. Yay! I went to the great mall with Jennifa. I bought two pairs of pants. They're both dickies, and they both fit well, and they both are comfortable, and the both won't hurt my belly button piercing. YAY! I've been buying too much clothes lately though. I need to stop with that. Anyfuck, I was discussing with Jennifa the fact that most people who read this don't live in the bay area and therefore don't know that the great mall is the name of the mall, and I'm not just some teenybopper who uses adjectives in describing malls. I thought I would clear that up for you.

Wow, I just remembered that Nelson (my ex-boyfriend/first kiss) was moving to Cupertino sometime this month. I'd like to hang out with him sometime before I go back to school. I haven't seen him in four years. That's crazy, huh? I think I'll email him after I finish writing this.

I'm having problems dealing with the whole not-being-with-Charlie-all-the-time thing again. I always get some separation anxiety after we've seen each other, but it usually goes away after a couple days. Maybe if I was more busy I wouldn't be so upset about it. Also, he's in New York right now and we aren't talking very often, so this time it's not like we're going through it together. I mean, I know he feels the same way, but he's busy busy busy, and I'm doing nothing nothing nothing. It's weird not talking to him right before I go to bed every night. I don't like to think about the fact that this may be what it's always like next year if he goes to NYU. For now I'm just gonna live in the moment cuz he doesn't like me to dwell on the future too much when it depresses me. I really hope he can come visit me by the end of break. Otherwise I don't know when we're gonna see each other again. I don't like not knowing when I get to be with him again. I know I have another diary for writing about Charlie, but oh well. That diary's more for happy thoughts, right? I dunno. Stop rambling, Laura. Aaaahhh!

I think I'm gonna go buy posters tomorrow cuz I need posters.

Wow, this becoming way too random. I'm gonna end it. Ta! ~BOB

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