You think she's an open book, but you don't know which page to turn to, do you?

I Can't Move my Head!
August 18, 2001 - 10:50 p.m.

Lately I've just been hanging out with my family. Last night I went out to dinner with my parents for the first time in awhile (although I ended up going to the movies with Jenny and Aley). Today I went out with my parents, sister, and grandparents to celebrate my grandparents' 53rd wedding anniversary. Isn't that amazing? I think I mentioned this during my parents' 27th anniversary, but I would just love to be able to stay with someone that long who I felt completely comfortable with and would never get sick of. My grandparents' had pictures from their wedding. There was also a picture of my grandma when she was younger. She was beautiful. She had long, semi-curly red hair. Too bad I didn't inherit that hair. My grandma's not in the best condition now. The medicine she takes for her Parkinson's (sp?) makes her hallucinate. My grandpa asked her if she had seen anything recently at one point, and she said, "yeah, there was someone in the bedroom, and someone on the couch in the living room." Later she said she saw a lion on the fence in the backyard, and a rock looked like a gorilla to her. It's odd how it's something that always happens to her, and she talks about it like it's perfectly normal.

While I was at my grandparents' house I pulled a muscle in my neck. It hurts like a bitch. My head has a continuous tilt to the right which makes me feel like a major dork. I can't turn my head to the left without REALLY trying and looking like I'm really trying. Plus, having your head in one position for an extended period of time gets tiresome. Sometimes I forget, move my head, and receive the most unpleasant wave of pain you could imagine. I also move my head on purpose sometimes, but I'm careful not to move it too fast. This isn't my first pulled muscle, so I know how to handle it. I wish I didn't get these so often. My sister said I need to exercise more, and she's probably right. I wouldn't have as bad of cramps if I exercised. I'm just too goddamn lazy!

I find it kinda interesting how when I have a migraine I think it's the most painful thing in the world. When I have cramps I think it's the most painful thing in the world. When I pull a muscle in my neck I think it's the most painful thing in the world. I guess I'll come to a grand realization when I give birth to a child some day.. or so my mom says. For now, I'll just dwell on my neck.

I just hope my neck works its kinks out in my sleep tonight cuz I have a list (literally) of shit to do tomorrow. They'd be a little uncomfortable to do while leaning my head to one side. Driving could be hell.. so this better go away fast.

Tonight I had another creepy I'm-growing-up moment. I accidentally knocked down a picture of my sister shaking the principal's hand while receiving her diploma during her high school graduation. The picture had been in our living room for ages, but I always thought of it as my big sister graduating.. something people older than I do. But tonight I realized that will be me in nine months. I'll be receiving all the "congratulations graduate" balloons she got... I'll have the big graduation cake.. the big graduation party.. people my mom worked with before I was born will come to congratulate me when I don't even know who the hell they are. That's just plain weird. I was twelve when my sister graduated.. I thought it would be ages until I was this old, and now I am.

I'm done. Wish my neck good health please. And sign my guestbook. Ta! ~BOB

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Lyrics taken from the song Open Book, by Cake.