Bitter
October 7, 2000 - 12:17:44 AM

Today.. well.. sucked of course. I suppose nothing in particular made it suck, but I'm still all depressed about the various depressing things in my life. I think I'm starting to adapt though. Slowly. I still don't find any motivation in life. I wonder why I go to school sometimes. I wonder why I bother doing anything.

The one guy in Newark I found attractive happens to also be liked by a friend of mine. Oh well.. I wasn't too set on him.

I started the search for Newark guys today.. all of the profiles on aol are homies. There's no hope. All the guys here are pricks. It was funny though. I sat down and told my mom that there was no selection of guys in Newark, and Lucky started meowing and gave me these eyes. I said, "no selection in HUMAN guys, Bucker," and he turned around and walked away. It was purdy funny. My mom was laughing. Lucky understands me. I truly think he does.

"You carry your blues behind your eyes. Don't flatter yourself, I will survive." ~Nine Days

Tonight Jenny and I went over to Monica's house to watch some movies. We started watching The Matrix, but Jenny and Monica didn't like it. They said it was boring. That's cuz they didn't get the storyline. Oh well, I guess that movie's not for everyone. Aaaaaanyway, so then we watched Here on Earth which sucked. It was waaaaaaay generic and predictable. Jenny's friend Aley said there was a surprise ending.. I didn't see any surprise. We predicted practically everything. I was rooting for the girl's original bf the entire time. He was way sweeter than the new guy who "swept her off her feet." He was a prick. Why do girls always fall for the pricks? That gives the rest of us a bad rep.

Monica's parents bought her and her sister a brand new Pontiac Grand Am. Lucky bum.

So now I'm half-asleep talking to Kelby, but I refuse to go to bed till my curfew. I have an essay to write this weekend, and a math assignment, and some history hw, and studying to do for the history test. It's not gonna be fun.

I also hafta go shopping this weekend. Most girls would be excited about this, but not me. Mainly cuz it isn't the fun kinda shopping; I hafta get a pair of pants, bras, and a backpack. I hate bra shopping with a passion. I think every girl does. If there's a girl who doesn't, she's gotta be on crack.

My head hurts.. oh well.. 20 mins and I hafta go to bed anyway. I want this weekend to end, but I don't want next week to start. I guess I'm just waiting for next weekend then. Yeah, that sounds good. Ok.

"If I could change anything then I would change everything. These bitter days shall remain." ~Nine Days

I'm gonna say bye now, so ta! ~BOB

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