Horrid
September 19, 2000 - 9:22:45 PM

Life doesn't seem to be getting much better. I have a headache right now.. my throat is feeling sore tonight, and I know that can't be good. I have a feeling my ol' weak immune system is kicking in again. Freshman year I got 10 colds cuz of it.. maybe I should use antibacterial stuff on my hands before I eat again like last year.

I was doing hw even later today than yesterday. Tomorrow doesn't look promising either. I know I'll be thanking the lord for block days though. If Wednesday and Thursday weren't block days I wouldn't be able to handle hw with dance class. Chances are I won't get online tomorrow night as it is and a lot of my stuff won't be due till Friday.

I told Jason I could tap dance today and he didn't believe me. So I stood up and did the time step. I get a high off of tapping for people I can't explain. Maybe it's cuz they always look impressed and that's flattering. I can't wait till class tomorrow.

I talked to Dave tonight and he could tell I didn't like him the same anymore, so it didn't take much for him to get it outta me. I feel really bad about it. I know we won't be able to be as good of friends anymore. I asked him if we could be friends and it took him like an hour to say, "ya sure." I feel like such a bitch. He really liked me too...

Jerry and I left on kinda awkward terms last night and he was afraid I had made up an excuse not to be able to talk to him tonight. (I wish I didn't hafta do this much hw, geez!) I think we basically came to an understanding as to what happened, so I feel better. I promised to be more open with him. I wish that could happen sooner than it will though.. cuz I know I probably won't be able to have a really good conversation with him until this weekend at the earliest cuz of all my hw. Sometimes I just feel like fucking the hw and calling him to spill about how shitty I feel. I know that would never happen, though, cuz I'm too dedicated to my school work, and I could never spill to anyone on the phone.. I hate the phone. I could totally spill to him online though.. or in person if I had the chance. I wish I had the chance. If anyone has any means to get me that chance, I would be greatly appreciative.

This weekend is Newark Days. I'm looking forward to that. Newark Days is the birthday of our lovely (horrid) town. We celebrate with a parade and a carnival. The carnival is as expensive as hell, but it's always fun to go for a bit. I'm sure Martha, Jane, and I will go and have a blast. They always have good fattening food there.. yuuuummmm. The rides are crap, the food is horrible for you, it's a perfect symbol of Newark as a whole, but no one misses out on it. Don't ask me why. I like watching the tap dancing competitions they have :o)

It's too hot here. This weather is pissing me off. It makes my stress seem twice as bad. I need to like... go to a spa or something. So I can get full body massages and mud baths all day. Oh, how sweet that would be.

We played frisbee golf in PE today. I kinda fucked it up for Martha and me. Oh well. My teacher called me by my sister's name. I hate being a younger sibling. No PE tomorrow though.. yay! ah.. no Hot Freshman either :o( I think I'll survive. It's not like I'll ever do anything but look at him.

"I don't care if they eat me alive. I've got better things to do than survive." ~Ani DiFranco

"I'm so lonely I don't even wanna be with myself anymore." ~Dido

That's all for now... sorry so sad. Ta ~BOB

Back To ~ The Future