I'm a God Damn Mother Fucking Son of a Bitch
May 9, 2002 - 7:18 p.m.

My neck hurts from laughing. See, Jenny and I both dled bonzibuddies. They're little purple talking monkeys who tell you interesting facts and jokes and stuff. They purdy much suck as a whole cuz they always ask you if you wanna "send them to school" which really means pay money for more jokes and interesting facts. And then they frown when you say no. A guilt trip from a purple monkey! Anyfuck, you hafta have a name the monkey calls you. I had Laura at first, but today I got the brilliant idea to change the name to Fucker. I got many laughs from that, but when I changed it to God Damn Mother Fucking Son of a Bitch, that was the clencher. I laugh so much every time he says it. So does my dad. We are two very mature individuals, mind you. You just hafta hear the way he says it! It's hilarious! If you have a bonzibuddy, I highly recommend changing your name to God Damn Mother Fucking Son of a Bitch.

The people finally finished working on our house, so I'm quite excited. My mom is even more so cuz her kitchen is now beautiful. She likes to stand at the entrance and just admire it. Crazy, but true. I come from a family of a buncha weirdos, lemme tell ya. That's how I became this way. Anycrap, it's nice to not have a fridge behind me. It still smells like paint here though, and that sucks.

Selena was gonna come over after school and watch Life as a House with me cuz she hasn't seen it yet and wants to, but she stood me up. That bitch! I think she just forgot; she woulda called otherwise. She's a stereotypical blonde, lemme tell ya. Once we had a rehearsal for choir during lunch, and after she wasn't there, I asked about it during 5th period. She was like, "Oh my god! I totally forgot! I was wondering where my sister and Jamie were..." She cracks me up. It kinda sucks that she didn't come today, though, cuz Jenny wanted to do something and I said I already had plans. I sat around the house doing nothing all day! Ugh!

I could really use a massage now. My neck is killing me. Someone, please come massage me. Please. Or sign my guestbook :o)

Well I'm off. Ta! ~BOB

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